From the original article on September 4, 2007. Author: Chateau Heartiste.
To the guys: How many times have you said this to a girl you had just met and were trying to pick up? For most of you, probably never. And yet pushing a girl away like this is one of the most powerful moves in the player’s arsenal. It’s like male T&A. As soon as you do it, the girl’s eyes will instantly light up with attraction. Oh, sure, she’ll put on a big indignant drama-fest, but her eyes won’t lie.
Pickup artists call this tactic “push-pull”. Naturals call it “being an asshole”. Most men don’t fully comprehend the potency of this maneuver because it seems so counter-intuitive. Why would physically and/or verbally turning a girl away from you make her more attracted? Isn’t the point to bring her toward you? The way you bring a girl toward you is by flipping the script of pursuer and pursued.
The simplest attraction switches are sometimes the hardest to trigger. When a girl is showing a guy real interest by touching his chest or leg, hanging on his every word, and inching closer into his personal space, his instinct is to lap it up like a thirsty dog. If she teases him with sex talk he responds with eager excitement. Then when she has lost interest he wonders why it all went south. For the average horny guy, it takes supreme willpower to spurn an attractive girl’s sex signals. And yet doing this will make her hotter quicker for him than anything else he could do.
The secret is that the girl *wants* the guy to push away her advances. Getting temporarily rejected turns her on. She’ll never admit this or understand it in any way because the rhythms of her female desire are a mystery even to herself. For those who want to know why the pushoff works on girls, psychologists would explain it in terms of the scarcity mentality; sociobiologists would say that a desirable man who can afford to reject individual mating opportunities at his leisure is attractive to women because his actions indirectly demonstrate that he is pre-selected by other women.
The player can mimic the sexually sated, emotionally detached alpha male with calculated pushoffs. When he is reading her palm, for instance, he could say “OK, that’s enough” and push her hand away. When she rests a hand on his chest after a joke, he could tell her “hey, this stuff ain’t free” and casually remove her hand from his chest. If she sits in his lap, he says “all right, get off me” and literally pushes her off. The trick to making this work without seeming like a mean prick is to push her off after you’ve pulled her in. Just pushing an indifferent girl away you haven’t yet drawn in with your game won’t cause her to run into your arms.
While push-pull is more overt during the attraction phase of the pickup, it continues on a subtle note right into the later stages of the seduction. As you progress to the point of making out, always be the first to break off the kissing. Same for groping; break it off first. Re-initiate after a few minutes of non-sexual chatting. This “two steps forward, one step back” process is a potent technique for making a girl feel as horny as you do.
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