Reader Mailbag: Happiness Maximization Edition


From the original article on May 6, 2009. Author: Chateau Heartiste.

Email #1

Just came back from a great night out, I’ll try to make this brief.

I am beta by every standard you can have. I am 24 and I’ve had one girlfriend, who I had for five years. She’s my only lay.

I have severe one-itis for a girl at work. She has a boyfriend. She’s loyal to him. I know how ridiculous this sounds.

The point is that I just came back from a night out with her and another guy, who isn’t her boyfriend. The other guy is better looking than I am. He speaks something like three languages. He is “exotic.” He has known the girl for a lot longer than I have; he has a personal nickname for her.

Despite that, I rocked the whole night. This guy didn’t stand a chance. It was brutal. Six months ago, she would have been all over him, and I would have been sitting on the sideline, feeling empty and depressed. I want to note that I haven’t sarged once in those six months. (I have only ever sarged once, and it was barely, with two friends sarging and me being relegated to the ugly friend while they fought over the hot one.)

How did this happen? Application of game, pure and simple, reading a lot of theory, but most of the stuff I can actually use has come from your site – not really practical tips (although these have helped), but just how you think about yourself.

I’m a little buzzed, so I can’t formulate this as well as I want to without being even more long-winded than I’m already being. But I just wanted to say thanks – sincere thanks for putting this stuff out there. In the reproduction competition of life, I am still losing. But I went out tonight and I had fun – something I can’t say I’ve had while “out” for most of my life, but twice in the last three weeks, I’ve gone out and done this. I’ve gone from staying at home and feeling fucked to going out and participating in life, even a few nights being “that guy” who is driving the life of the party.

So even if I’m never a guy who can attract women consistently (although my belief that this is impossible fades day by day), application of the principles you espouse on the site have enabled me to actually be able to engage women in a way where I’m having fun, she’s having fun, where there is sexual tension and attraction, things that I have not really ever experienced as an adult. It is a feeling I can only describe as amazing.

Do I think you can be an asshole at times? Yeah. Who doesn’t? But I’d be the first guy to raise my hand to object to anyone who says what you’re doing is destructive, bad, etc. I’m biased because it’s my life, so it feels much more immediate, but just the fact that what you’re publishing on your site has been this useful, not to merely manifesting happiness, but virtually constructing it, in this one important arena of a man’s life – washes away a multitude of sins.

Best to you and yours, thanks again.
B.

I beam with pride when I read emails like this one. My hatred and evil brings love and good into the world. What was that sucking noise? Ah, yes, another steaming load of useless new age twaddle circling the drain.

First off, if you’ve had a girlfriend for five years that you were banging then you are not a beta “by every standard”, unless she is fat or ugly. Truly incorrigible betas can’t even manage that. So don’t beat yourself up too much. You’re not losing “in the reproduction area of life” because there are millions of men who aren’t getting any pussy at all and have to satisfy themselves with fleshlights. At your age with your one long-term girlfriend, you are, in fact, right smack in the middle of the oat-sowing bell curve.

Second, don’t fret about consistency in picking up chicks. From my experience and from what I know of naturals who do well with women, you will have brief periods of scarcity. This is the ebb and flow of the sexual market. Don’t panic and try to force your way out of those normal, cyclical downtimes. Foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of beta minds. If you get into the self-defeating habit of ticking off the days and weeks since your last lay you will poison the well of your carefully cultivated alpha essence. Alphas never care about time since last bang because they don’t operate from a scarcity mentality; they know another woman is always within reach.

It is a feeling I can only describe as amazing.

Just wait until you jizz up her nose and she sneezes it out.

Do I think you can be an asshole at times? Yeah.

Don’t forget a narcissistic prick.

I’m biased because it’s my life, so it feels much more immediate, but just the fact that what you’re publishing on your site has been this useful, not to merely manifesting happiness, but virtually constructing it, in this one important arena of a man’s life – washes away a multitude of sins.

You wrote something important here — happiness is not granted from on high nor is it a wispy feeling that randomly alights on your mood. Happiness is constructed. It is the direct result of actions taken that further your genes’ goals of survival and reproduction. The better a man becomes with women, the happier he will be. Only monks dedicated to stripping themselves of their humanity and disembodying their consciousness from their physical shells can be said to rise above this happiness equation. Sure you could be a monk, but it’s easier to learn game. And a lot more fun.

Email #2

I met a girl with a ‘prior engagement.’ She lives with him, and likes him but somehow found herself on my lips. It was on an overnight cruise. She was receptive to my touch; every kiss, however, would end with her withdrawing and looking down in shame, touching. She did not reveal to her friends this dalliance of hers.

How would you overcome such resistance?

Note: This question is more hypothetical in nature; I did not take her number.

bien respectueusement

A.M.

She’s feeling like a cheap whore. As well she should. Your job, should you decide to accept it, is to communicate your nonjudgmentalism and the premium you place on secrecy in your affairs. “I believe that a good life, a fulfilled life, is one where we explore the possibilities, and never deny ourselves genuine happiness. There is nothing worse in life than regret, wouldn’t you agree?”

When she looks down, draw her attention away from her great shame. Take her hand and pull her to another location, point out the birghtness of the moon to her, and force her mind to occupy itself with positive feelings. You want to drown her guilt in a cascade of competing emotions. Venue changing is of utmost importance. So is establishing an immoveable frame. When she mutters regret under her breath, or looks down at her lap after a makeout, ignore the beta bait. Pull back and talk about random things. In her horror at the surge of her own uncontainable desire, she may blurt out details of her ‘prior engagement’, as if you should care. Ignore her. These are the words of a woman in the process of rationalizing what she is about to do despite her misgivings. Never attempt to engage her logically by talking her into an affair. That will backfire. Always... ALWAYS... remain in the realm of feelings. Good feelings. Whimsical feelings. ...HORNY feelings.

Email #3

Feel free to publish this but don’t include my name or address.

She cheated. I don’t want her back. I want to crush her ego to the point where she will regret this action forever.

You know the answer.

Anon

Unlike the spineless pissboys and pissgirls who infest the ranks of our postmodern society (and this blog) with their limpdicked self-help dribblings to “move on” and “be the better man”, I will give you a chalice of hearty vengeance straight up and garnished with a gleeful cackle. Drink it down and feel it nourish your soul. After all, revenge is as sweet as love, and as natural. We would not possess the feeling if it did not most times work to our benefit.

First, I have to assume something about you and her. If she is crawling back to you hoping to wash away the stain of her sin by offering her only begotten womb to hang on the shaft of your cock, take her one more time. Keep the video camera running out of view while you are ripping apart her anus. Have bra and panties from another woman (purchased if necessary) lying strategically under your pillow for her to find during or after sex. When she has run crying out of your home, send a copy of the video to her parents with the words “A girl who was raised right” and a copy to the man with whom she cheated with the words “She loves you.” Go to a payphone in another city where you cannot be traced and call her employer, notifying them that she has been pilfering company property, and as you are a friend of another employee of that company who tipped you off (do some research and find out who her friends are where she works) you thought they should know. Tell human resources you must remain anonymous because the tip-off friend is worried that she (your girlfriend) has an explosive personality and might do something drastic.

If, on the other hand, she is not coming back for more sex, your options are more limited and you will have to do additional legwork to exact your vengeance. Do you have old sex vids of her in possession? Do what I wrote above. If you don’t have sex vids, find out if she is still seeing the guy she cheated with? If so, go to him in the spirit of two brothers meeting to discuss a family matter and offer him cash to make a lurid sex video of her and pass it on to you for public exposure. Your goal is to drag her reputation through the mud; girls live and breathe by their reps. If the new guy loves her, this tactic probably won’t be fruitful, unless you are willing to pay handsomely.

If the sex vid option is unavailable, do some research to locate and meet all her ex-boyfriends. Almost all exes would be happy to stick the shiv in for shits and giggles. Dig up as much dirt, true or not, as possible from them, along with pics and any love notes or saved emails, compile it into a prurient email novella and pass along to all her friends using an anonymous remailer so you cannot be traced. Be sure to have taped recordings of your ex bad-mouthing her current girlfriends (almost all girls have called a BFF “fat” or “slutty”) and insert them into your email as an audio file. Start a blog called “Mylovenoteto[name of your ex].com” and update daily with pics and torrid gossip. Always deny involvement.

Godspeed, Avatar of the Light!


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