From the original article on October 29, 2007. Author: Chateau Heartiste.
There are a few red flags that tip me off about a girl’s sexual history. I’m a big fan of loose girls as they make my job easier, but there’s no doubt a girl who has spread for you, your friends, your father, mr. ed loses some luster in my eyes.
If I take a girl back to her place for the first time and her roommates act like my presence is no big deal, I lower my opinion of her. I’m a guy these roommates have never met before, there to engage in explicit acts of defilement, and they’re coming up to me shaking my hand all smiles and telling me to make myself comfortable and would I like anything to drink? This is how that gets processed in my brain:
Just another guy that XXX has brought back with her. We’re so accustomed to this by now the shock and awe has worn off. In fact, maybe I should tell him the house rules about disposing of used condoms.
Here’s a hint, ladies. When I go back to your place and you have roommates, I want your roomies scurrying like rats looking for a dark place to hide. I do not want it to be the View with special male guest. Unless your roommates are cute females open to group sex, nothing kills the passion faster than a nonchalant hippie commune vibe.
***
I appreciate a girl who asks if I have a condom. But when I don’t and she reaches into her nightstand to get one I don’t want to see six different varieties (especially Trojan Magnum) in half-empty econoboxes tumble out. Again, this is what I’m thinking:
So you work as a condom quality control tester. After much trial and error with repeated penetrations from an assortment of penis shapes and sizes you have zeroed in on your favorite brand.
“Happen” to have one lying around. Ignorance is bliss.
***
Spontaneous dirty talk is hot. Sex talk that sounds like either you watch a lot of porn and are trying to mimic a pornstar (which is kinda pathetic) or it was rehearsed over and over again with many different guys until you got it just right is not hot. I don’t want our intimacy to sound scripted.
Yeah, right there, fuck me right there. yeah you like it there don’t you? Oh yeah, a little harder. Harder. HARDER! you want some of this? you like my tight pussy? stick it in me deep. all the way in. fuck me fuck me fuck me oh yeah i’m a bad girl aren’t i? you like a bad girl dontcha? oh yeah your cock is soo big it feels soo good a little more like that just like that. you love jamming it into my hot wet tight pussy...
Sometimes silence is golden. A soft moan goes a long way.
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