From the original article on May 8, 2011. Author: Chateau Heartiste.
We already know, thanks to the spiritually enriching wisdom of this blog, that a man should never say ‘I love you’ before his girlfriend has said it. But there’s more.
Reader Shark writes:
Other things to never say first:
“I miss you”
“Let’s be exclusive”
“I want to have children”
These are all right on the money. In fact, the only way a man can say the above and remain optimally attractive to his girlfriend is if a “too” is appended to each. For example:
“I miss you, too”
“I want to be exclusive, too”
“I want to have children, too. Wait... what?”
Better yet, a shit-eating smirk in response to a girlfriend saying any of the above works wonders to beef up alpha allure.
Additional emotional outpourings a man should never say first in a relationship:
“Let’s move in together”
“I was worried about you”
“At least let me know where you’ll be”
“Can I have your work number so I have a way to reach you in case of emergency?”
“I love cats”
“Your farts smell like a bouquet of roses”
The problem with emotional outpourings is that they will be perceived differently depending on the sex of the recipient. When a man hears these things from a girlfriend, he thinks ‘Wow, this chick is into me. The sex spigot is open at full blast!’
But when a woman hears these things unprompted from a boyfriend, she thinks ‘Aw, how sweet, he likes me. Hm. Kinda needy, though, isn’t it? Why are my labia curling inward?’
To a woman’s ears, her boyfriend’s ‘I miss you’ never just means ‘I miss you’. It also means ‘I’m really scared you’ll leave me’, and ‘I’m saying this as part of a passive-aggressive strategy to guilt you into continuing to allow me access to your pussy’, and ‘My god, there’s no way I can get another woman if you decide to upgrade.’ So be careful about not just the timing, but the tonality, of when and how you tell a lover you miss her, love her and/or wish to commit to her. Good rules of thumb:
EOBs are inherently beta, and thus must be used with caution. Acts of beta (AoB) are never meant to be avoided entirely — the AoB is, in fact, a critical component of relationship game that helps to solidify a girlfriend’s feelings of comfort and security in your company — but they do need to be utilized with the utmost care, because overuse can happen quickly and *will* degrade a girlfriend’s attraction to you.
Some of you will undoubtedly ask, “Well, what if she never says any EOB first?” If that’s the case, then you shouldn’t consider her anything more than a fuck toy. Additional commitment with such a woman is courting heartbreak. Any woman truly falling for you will wind up blurting out an EOB against her better judgment. A woman in love can’t help herself.
Maxim #26: Women secretly hope that you won’t rob them of the opportunity to make themselves vulnerable before your alpha inscrutability.
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